Psalm Reflection: The Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph - Cycle A

“Blessed are those who fear the Lord and walk in his ways.” - Psalms 128

From a very young age, most of us want to grow up to be like our fathers. It is an interesting psychological phenomenon, and we universally recognize the harm and detrimental effects on children when there is not a father present in the home. The same can obviously also be said of the essential role of mothers, but there is an interesting difference between the two.

Psychologically speaking, it is from our mothers that we form a picture of our identity. As babies, we do not understand that our mothers are separate from us. Rather, we see them as an extension of ourselves, and, as a result, our mothers and our relationships to them help shape who we are and how we see ourselves.

However, our fathers are the first "other,” we observe. As children, we watch them. We observe their actions and habits and seek to mimic them. In other words, our mothers shape who we are and our fathers shape how we are and what we do. This is not to say that it is black and white, there is obvious overlap, but many studies confirm this phenomenon. 

For example, in relationship to obesity, studies show that if only a mother is obese, there is no assurance or definitive likelihood that her children will be, only that there will be a slightly greater likelihood than if she were not overweight. On the other hand, if a father is obese, there is almost a guarantee that the children also will be. Why, because the children will be quicker to learn and mimic the habits of the father.

Similar studies have been produced around spirituality and religious observance. For instance, if the parents in a Catholic family do not go to Mass and do not practice their faith at all, there is a less than 1% chance that their children will in adulthood. No surprise there. But, If only the mother goes to Mass, the likelihood of the children continuing to go to Mass and practice their faith in adulthood only increases to about 3-5%. However, if both parents attend Mass and regularly practice the faith, the likelihood that their children will practice their faith and attend Mass in adulthood skyrockets to roughly 80%. 

I credit my openness to God and religion as an adult to watching my father read the Bible and go to daily mass when I was a child. Even though my dad no longer attends Mass nor practices his faith, seeing him practice the faith when I was at such a formative age instilled in me the importance of having God in my life.

I wanted to be just like my dad. He was a computer programmer and analyst for roughly 45 years. He is incredibly intelligent, logical, and analytical. As a result, I was on a computer and was learning basic coding and programming at four years old. I have always valued learning, intelligence, and problem-solving, because that is what I learned from my father.

Today, the Church is on the precipice of one of our greatest celebrations and seasons. Tomorrow we rejoice in the Incarnation, God becoming man, because our Savior was born. In The Catechism of the Catholic Church, we are given four reasons why Jesus became man. One of these reasons is simply because Jesus wanted to show us how to live:

The Word became flesh to be our model of holiness: "Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me." "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but by me." On the mountain of the Transfiguration, the Father commands: "Listen to him!" Jesus is the model for the Beatitudes and the norm of the new law: "Love one another as I have loved you." This love implies an effective offering of oneself, after his example. - CCC 459

In the same way we all grow up wanting to be like our dads, Jesus came to live a human life to show us how to be like his father. To be Christian literally means to be a "little Christ.” We are called to model our lives after Christ's life, and to, as the Psalmist puts it, “to walk in his ways.”

Perhaps this Christmas is an invitation for us to focus less on what we are giving and receiving, but more so on who we are becoming. Jesus desires to be born anew into your life every single day, not just once a year. He offers us a model to follow so that we can live the most joyful and abundant life possible. So let us approach the Lord with wonder and humility, very much like children looking up to their fathers as if they can do anything, and recognize that our father in heaven actually can do anything and evrything in our lives if we let Him.

When I think of my parents, what habits or virtues did I imitate most, and how are they shaping me now?

Which parts of my identity were most formed by my relationship with my mom? Which of my behaviors were most shaped by my dad?

What did I learn about God from watching my father practice (or not practice) the faith?

Where am I “walking in His ways,” and where am I still walking on my own?

What specific habit from Jesus’ life do I want to imitate in my life now?

How can I let Jesus be “born anew” in me today, not just once a year?

I am praying for you. Please pray for me and my family, and I will see you in the Eucharist.

Merry Christmas,

Matt

This reflection is based on the Responsorial Psalm for this Sunday, December 28th, 2025, the Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph - Cycle A: Psalms 128:1-2, 3, 4-5.